The Evil of My Ways
Oh the what-ifs and where-to-fors and the whatevers. What if I were not so harsh? Not so demanding? More accepting of how and who people are? What if I allowed people to be weak and meek and fearful? What if I allowed people to be underhanded and sly while polishing their shell of sweetness? (If only I had a thesaurus!) ~note to self: ask Thomas for a Christmas Thesaurus~
The question remains; should I or shouldn't I? I feel it bubbling inside of me..When people are pussy-ish. When people are wishy-washy. When people cannot make a decision. When people zip their lips like six year olds. I feel inclined to tell them who they are. To point out their fallacies. The weakness of their ways. And I do. I generally find it difficult to hold back....Difficult being a mild understatement. And this makes me...A bully. Out of the mouths of babes. Babes who live at home with mommy and daddy and much too old boyfriend. Babes who plan to be married by 21 so to follow mamma's and gramma's footsteps. Babes to have three children by age 30.
And I have yet to answer the question. Am I doing any good by calling out to cowards? Probably not. Except in cases where I am directly affected. Scheduling comes to mind. Sick days. To take them or not? To force a spineless man to schedule them or not? To call in or to say I will be gone, schedule as such? I can keep quiet for a while. I can be still. But then I would be questioned. What is wrong? Are you mad? How do you feel? What do you think? And people genuinely don't know. They really don't learn. They don't know what will say. What will set me off. What I think. How I feel. They don't know they are being foolish. Or at least they don't know I think they are being foolish. How does one not learn? I have learned the ways of others with great predictability. Does no one pay enough attention to my rants to know what I will say or think or feel or do? So I am wasting my breath. I am using valuable time and effort on issues that do not matter, except of course when they directly affect me. Scheduling comes to mind.
Question answered.
The question remains; should I or shouldn't I? I feel it bubbling inside of me..When people are pussy-ish. When people are wishy-washy. When people cannot make a decision. When people zip their lips like six year olds. I feel inclined to tell them who they are. To point out their fallacies. The weakness of their ways. And I do. I generally find it difficult to hold back....Difficult being a mild understatement. And this makes me...A bully. Out of the mouths of babes. Babes who live at home with mommy and daddy and much too old boyfriend. Babes who plan to be married by 21 so to follow mamma's and gramma's footsteps. Babes to have three children by age 30.
And I have yet to answer the question. Am I doing any good by calling out to cowards? Probably not. Except in cases where I am directly affected. Scheduling comes to mind. Sick days. To take them or not? To force a spineless man to schedule them or not? To call in or to say I will be gone, schedule as such? I can keep quiet for a while. I can be still. But then I would be questioned. What is wrong? Are you mad? How do you feel? What do you think? And people genuinely don't know. They really don't learn. They don't know what will say. What will set me off. What I think. How I feel. They don't know they are being foolish. Or at least they don't know I think they are being foolish. How does one not learn? I have learned the ways of others with great predictability. Does no one pay enough attention to my rants to know what I will say or think or feel or do? So I am wasting my breath. I am using valuable time and effort on issues that do not matter, except of course when they directly affect me. Scheduling comes to mind.
Question answered.
posted by wonderfull journeywoman at 10:06 AM
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