Awake In A Funk
It's rough going to bed angry, particularly when one doesn't know why one is angry. But I kid myself. I know why he is angry. He doesn't want me to spend the money even though we discussed it, he was fine with it, and it is for us. But he will pout. That is the most annoying thing, when a mans pouts. I suppose it annoys him when I pout as well. I just get tired of the grunting and the lack of cuddling and the "I'm hot! It's too hot!" routine. Then turn the fucking air conditioner on. He gets upset because I don't fall all over him like I used to. Perhaps if he would bathe in the morning...or brush his teeth. I think perhaps he is looking for a reason to not have sex with me and then he can blame me for it all. I don't believe I will be putting up with that much longer.
"Alright, that's enough. I come on to you and you're hot or you're whiny and I'm not going to work at it if it is going to put you out. So I don't even want to hear that it is my fault. Get over yourself. Lose some weight. Take a bath. Brush your teeth."
That really didn't make me feel better. In fact, it was almost silly. Check. It would be silly to say it in those terms. Yet that is how I feel. So now that I have it out of my head and into cyber land, perhaps I can get a grip on the situation.
NEXT SUBJECT PLEASE!
Running: I have this race on Saturday...or possibly Sunday. Was originally 3 miles. Now it is almost 6. Having trouble running 2. Guess I'll be ok. When I feel like I can't go anymore, I will stop and walk for one minute. Then I will pick it up and keep going. I can do this. I Just don't want to. But, hopefully it will jump start my metabolism. I sortely need to take off 20 pounds. The older I get, the harder it is. I would much rather be reading. Yet I need to be healthy. received info yesterday from a holistic dermatologist about how food choices cause acne. So I ate Doritos and read the info. Well, peanut butter is bad for you. Thought I was doing so well!!! Apparently there is mold on the outside of the peanut that causes the body distress. I know what I need to eat. It's the whole fruits and vegetables thing. I cannot and will not give up dairy. But I will give up junk food. I need to give up white sugar and even sugar substitutes. That will not be one of my easier tasks. Perhaps I will cut down to one packet in my tea. Don't think I can drink it unsweetened. BLECK!
Need to go do the run thing. ThinkI am here only to not be out there. But, it has to be done. For my health and well being at this marathon.
I'm off~
"Alright, that's enough. I come on to you and you're hot or you're whiny and I'm not going to work at it if it is going to put you out. So I don't even want to hear that it is my fault. Get over yourself. Lose some weight. Take a bath. Brush your teeth."
That really didn't make me feel better. In fact, it was almost silly. Check. It would be silly to say it in those terms. Yet that is how I feel. So now that I have it out of my head and into cyber land, perhaps I can get a grip on the situation.
NEXT SUBJECT PLEASE!
Running: I have this race on Saturday...or possibly Sunday. Was originally 3 miles. Now it is almost 6. Having trouble running 2. Guess I'll be ok. When I feel like I can't go anymore, I will stop and walk for one minute. Then I will pick it up and keep going. I can do this. I Just don't want to. But, hopefully it will jump start my metabolism. I sortely need to take off 20 pounds. The older I get, the harder it is. I would much rather be reading. Yet I need to be healthy. received info yesterday from a holistic dermatologist about how food choices cause acne. So I ate Doritos and read the info. Well, peanut butter is bad for you. Thought I was doing so well!!! Apparently there is mold on the outside of the peanut that causes the body distress. I know what I need to eat. It's the whole fruits and vegetables thing. I cannot and will not give up dairy. But I will give up junk food. I need to give up white sugar and even sugar substitutes. That will not be one of my easier tasks. Perhaps I will cut down to one packet in my tea. Don't think I can drink it unsweetened. BLECK!
Need to go do the run thing. ThinkI am here only to not be out there. But, it has to be done. For my health and well being at this marathon.
I'm off~
posted by wonderfull journeywoman at 8:43 AM
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